The Malaysiana Digests

Chasing After the One

I found myself in Teapot Cafe again today. After having a bad start to the day, I finally dragged myself out of the house to meet up with Sue, who's back from Perth, for coffee and eclairs (I had the eclairs, she just had coffee - residual guilt from being told by her father about how fat she's getting).

We talked about friends, about our lives since we last met, which was some time last year, about where we wanted to be and where we're heading. She'll be finishing her degree soon, and it's great to see that she's got a lot of interesting options ahead of her.

Looking at where she is at now, I wondered about what I've done in the last 5 years since I left university. 5 years seemed like 10, so many things have happened, nothing according to plan. At such milestones as our graduation day, we tend to make mental notes: get that job, get hitched, get a baby, get a political career - those kind of things. But what happens in between those things we often consider the significant milestones in life?

What of those people who never achieve the perfect job, the fulfilling relationship, the family situation? Does this mean that they have a lesser existence than those who have achieved the status symbols of a 'good' life?

Personally, I've given up on waiting for 'the one' of sorts. To me, life is about the in-betweens, about the fulfilling seconds and minutes between the significant events, and if the significant events never happen, at least I know I didn't waste any time waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Don't mistake this for a defeatist attitude. It is an attitude adjustment - a different way of looking at things to enable a better, more fulfilling existence, irrespective of how the world defines fulfilment.

Heartbreak

This is going to be a spoiler for SATC fans - so if you haven't watched Season 6, don't read.

I just have to let it out - my heart is broken! Miranda is NOT, I repeat, she is NOT going to end up with Robert, that cute doctor. The disappointment... the heartbreak! Ugh!

Jikon - I admit that you were so right. SATC is depressing.

Generations

My family has a very interesting composition. There are 8 of us siblings, 6 from my mother and 2 from my step-mother. We were born in what they call the 'selang bunga' composition - girl, boy, girl, boy etc.. all the way to the last one. Between my sisters, we don't look like we're related unless we're standing all together, or with the one that's immediately before and after us in sequence. For example, Nazeehan and I don't look alike at all, unless we have Najwa standing in the middle - then the similarities emerge.

If you've been reading my blog regularly, you'd know that my sister Najwa has a daughter, Aeisyah Humaira' who is approaching her first birthday in 2 months' time. Interesting that while she definitely looks like her mother, those who remember what I looked like as a baby insist that she looks a bit like me. Either way, it's nice to have another left-handed person in the family - based on the fact that Aeisyah likes to pick up things and slap people with her left hand, my sister has deduced that she is the 4th left-handed person in the family - after me, Nadia and Abduh!

I found this old photo of Najwa and me - take a good look and then have a look at my vast repository of Aeisyah pictures...

Spinning

My mind is still spinning - the day went so fast and in such a blur that I lost my dimensional orientation - things I thought in my head, I thought I heard - or something along those lines. Am I going nuts? I hope not, because that would mean that my colleagues may be in the same boat.

You know those days, when the state of sleep is indistinguishable from being awake, when you have put together so many sentences and diagrams and read reams and reams of material (nowadays, it's on a CD, but it sounds better as paper) that you just churn things out without thinking too much about them once it's done.

It's almost like being a solution factory.

Still trying to catch my breath, my only relief were few and far between. The first came at about 11 - as my head almost hit my notebook monitor, Nadd gave me this link (Try the link! Try the link!). Five minutes of it, and I was fully alert and raring to go.

The second one was a beautiful shawl that I managed to pick up from Khazanah in KLCC. Its blue and silver threads intertwine into leafy motifs - it's soft and warm - and so much better as a comfort splurge than dessert and coffee.

A Turkish Birthday

I finally found something significant enough to blog about. Phewh! I thought I'd be stuck in this state of dis-inspiration forever!

Yesterday we celebrated the autumnal equinox/See Ming's birthday party at a quaint little Turkish restaurant called Saray on Jalan Doraisamy on the Asian Heritage Row (next to Sheraton Imperial Hotel).

The restaurant was warm and welcoming - its walls were adorned with beautiful bowls with intricate hand-painted designs. I forgot for a minute that I was still in KL, as almost every element of the decor was distinctly Turkish.

We were served chive bread and pita bread for starters, along with hummus and two other types of dips I didn't recognise. Our mains was rice with a delicious beef stew (sorry, again, ignorant of the names of dishes as I was too busy stuffing my face...). The restaurant also serves a wide range of desserts - yes, they have Baklava!

The Party:
The company was great! See Ming brought together an interesting mix of people. The usual suspects were there: Jikon, Zarina, Naliza and Sharizal, plus Raimy whom I managed to drag along while he's still in town.

It was great catching up with the PROMUDA/Toasties bunch, even better to be able to meet food-critic John of AWSJ again, whose write-up on Sarang Murai is eagerly anticipated. I was pleasantly surprised to see an old acquaintance, Jui Hong of Phische and someone whom I've only seen online - Terrence (of TV Smith's Dua Sen) - better known for his 'Naked Card' and Uncle Ho articles.

Met some interesting people, notably Andrew of the Star's Teh Tarik column, who surprised us with his vast knowledge of Malaysian historical manuscripts. Of course, the most interesting person that night, the birthday girl herself, who's talent for mix-and-matching people is legendary...

Happy Birthday See Ming! May all your wishes come true, save one, so that you'll always have something to strive for...

Open Letter to Rambai and Roslan,

Dear Rambai/Roslan,

The motivation for me to close this thread is because the post was irrelevant to the topic at hand. The topic should be discussed somewhere more appropriate, and hidden underneath the previous post is not the right place.

If Rambai was upset with me, that's his prerogative. However, in the spirit of gaining knowledge, a more constructive discussion should be initiated - with a much larger audience.

Personal comments, like Roslan's assumption of what I'm like based on my action to close the comment, in my opinion, is his right. It is my right to move or close discussions where I see fit.

Like it or not, there will be differences of opinions on how to run a country, how to run a family and how to run your life. I would suggest that those who feel that they have a credible opinion to put it to constructive use, like putting together a proposal paper, or a study, incorporating those elements that drive their own life, e.g. beliefs, expertise etc for others to debate and discuss.

p.s. to all: No, I didn't say I was going to stop writing, I just realised that I hadn't written for a couple of days and wondered why. It seemed like I didn't have anything that I could blog about. =P

p.p.s. to Roslan: Thanks for apology. The analysis was right in some ways, but not for the reason you mentioned.

p.p.p.s. to Rambai: I just re-read the comments in that post in Suara Malaysia. I have to say, your use of language is shameful and vulgar and your arguments utterly ignorant.

Those who feel the urge to give the time of day to Rambai's arguments in my blog would be doing themselves a favour by reading what he wrote.

Things You Just Don't Tell

My blog was among six that was mentioned in an unflattering article in Eh! magazine. Enough commentaries here.

However, to prove a point that bloggers know when to shut up, I am shutting up for a while (have been since my last post), until I find something else that is significant and fit to blog about.

Trunk Art

This was taken at the Melbourne Zoo's Elephant Painting and Conservation Exhibition at Federation Square. On display were paintings by Melbourne Zoo's Asian Elephants, Bong Su and Mek Kapah, to raise funds for elephant conservation programmes.

More at the Gallery.

What's In My Name?

(Yet another moment of self-absorption, but hey! It's my blog!)

My name, in Arabic, means success. I was told that this name was suggested to my mother by an Iranian friend. I've only come across 3 other Najah's, one in person, and 2 either online or through extended contacts. I have a male officemate whose name is Najeh, and there has been many moments of confusion by our boss, colleagues and people in general.

I came across this site quite some time ago, but it's interesting to revisit its findings as I learn more things about myself.

Brief Analysis

Your name of Najah gives you a very idealistic but passive outlook on life. You desire culture and all the refinements of life but you are inclined to live in your dreams. Although you would like to do many things, procrastination undermines your accomplishment and success in life. You do not like to create issues and will do anything to avoid a conflict. Making decisions is difficult for you without the support and approval of others.

This name gives you a very sensitive nature, making you feel much that you do not understand. Your feelings are easily hurt, at which times you are inclined to withdraw and become uncommunicative. Although you desire the friendship and association of others, you find it difficult to express your thoughts through the spoken word, and others find you hard to get to know. It is much more natural for you to express your deeper thoughts in writing. Inner tension can deplete your physical vitality.

Health Weaknesses for the name of: Najah

You are inclined to indulge in rich foods that lack proper nourishment. The physical weaknesses due to this name centre in the heart and respiratory organs, and in the fluid functions.

Friends and family, please don't fall over each other to tell me how true this thing is, because I am already acknowledging it as such. If you'd like to swing the proverbial bat, please give me a call (hehe.. desperate ploy to solicit good conversation here...).

This is so spooky. It's almost consistent with this other 'analysis'. I need a scientific explanation as to why my personal traits are so... OBVIOUS! (Although statistically, if you throw a dart in the ocean, you'll always hit water.)

Life is Too Short

It's interesting how often people say that. That life is too short.

A Yoda friend of mine once told me that what 'makes' us is the choices we make in life, not our misfortunes, and not our privileges. Couple that with the aforementioned guiding principle that life is too short, the question that begs to be asked: What should one do?

Today, I found my mind wandering off to people I wish I had said things to when I had the chance, people who are now too far to hold, people who if I had the chance to turn back the clock, I would have kept close to my heart.

Interesting what goes through your mind when you happen to have that chance meeting in the lift, chance glance at dinner, and chance thought over a drowsy afternoon. These things happened to me today - and each time, I found myself making a conscious choice to speed past my own past with these individuals, and make a lightning quick decision: to smile, to give a knowing look, or to just look away.

Survival List ala City Mice

With a survival list like this, how can I NOT be worried that my two braders are on a camping trip together???

For the moment, I'm already well stocked with provisions. Here's a sample list:

a. 5 Machetes
b. 3 Daggers
c. 4 Lifejackets
d. Snake Venom antidote
e. 5 Cameras & 20 rolls of film
e. Biscuits from Fortnum & Masons
f. Tea from Fauchon and Harvey Nicks
g. A bottle of Penfolds Cab Sav Bin 407
h. A bottle of Moet et Chandon
i. A magnum of Evian (still).
l. A dozen bottles of Perrier (sparkling)
j. Ministry of Sound / Gatecrasher CDs
k. Compass and GPS
l. 3 pairs of Blundstone and Florsheim boots
m. Davidoff cigars
n. My favourite metal mug
o. Sarongs.

Well, that's the essentials. Hey! I gotta live somehow ! ;-)

Ugh! Note to them: Come back safe yah?

A Family, A Home, A Job, A Life?

I was surprised by a comment made by a male friend recently on what he finds desirable in a woman. Being the young, high-powered big boss who was too busy to find a spouse type, it was not surprising that he finds powerful career-minded women enticing.

The bit that struck me as odd is that he finds the idea of slogging at work for his family, knowing that his wife too would have made the same sacrifice by staying at home, desirable.

No, despite how it may sound, this is not the typical chauvinistic comment that get working women all riled up. I had to paraphrase, but I assure you, it was made in the sweetest, most noble way possible.

It was not a statement which defined roles for a man or a woman, it was just something he preferred. He did not see it as something he fitted into, like a new jacket your dad asks you to wear. It was something he realised he was good at - working, and his motivations for working was to support a family. The fact that I know that this man slogs - and very hard at that, is enough to prove to me that he does see work as a sacrifice and perhaps, an ibadah, as opposed to just something you do to get somewhere in society. He once had something to prove, a primary motivator for those long hours, but I would like to go as far to assume that this has now taken a back-seat to his need and desire to provide.

Assuming that this is where he is going, it is not surprising that he would require a partner with the same amount of passion and commitment for the family - but in the home.

This got me to thinking, we (and by we, I mean men and women), always fall for the stereotypes in our verbal communication with regards to this topic: that if a woman is intelligent and has a mind of her own, she HAS to have a career. But in this day and age, I come across many women who don't have a mind of her own, who is not in control of the path she has taken, who just so happened to end up having a job, because she studied in school, got a scholarship/loan, went to university, and had to get a job to service her financial commitments. It is also more common for a woman to work nowadays as families have higher aspirations to the quality of life they want to lead, which translates to the income required to supplement this lifestyle.

It may even seem bolder today for intelligent and educated women to make a conscious decision to commit themselves fully to a family, something I see as a difficult decision in that you are putting a lot of trust in your partner, something you should be able to do anyway once you commit to a marriage or a permanent relationship. But there is something to be said about that too...

I am not passing any judgments on women who choose a career in the office or at home, or those who choose to balance the two. But I do see the heartache of female colleagues who are neither here nor there - half the career woman and half the mother. It's difficult, and no matter what people say about working women having it easy, more often than not, the half-and-half woman ends up putting in a lot more effort than her spouse.

And society never fails to judge. A successful career woman has a day in the news, where she is described as 34, managing director of so and so inc, and mother of 2. The attachment to her marital status and/or family is almost always apparent, as if society will not forgive her for being successful in industry if her family-life is non-existent.

I am reminded of a scene in an episode of Sex and the City (season 6), where Miranda, the lawyer, was reprimanded at work for being late to client meetings by her boss and colleague, who proceeded to note that they 'understand' that it must be difficult, with the new baby and all. She ends up reassuring them that it wouldn't happen again, proceeds to update him on the good news on her latest case, and leaves with a parting thought: "Where I am not doing a good job is at home."

Cafe Culture

On my recent trip to Melbourne, I discovered how young they start them on cafe culture. At Laurent, a chain of french patisseries that have sprouted in Melbourne, it was interesting to see the composition of patrons on a Wednesday morning.

The work crowd had of course, settled into their cubicles by the time we got there, and soon after, the more mature and mobile set showed up - with little people in tow.

We ordered our lattes, the freshest apricot danish I have ever tasted and a delicious serving of roasted pumpkin and mushroom tart.

Soon after we got our orders, Victoria shrieked. She spotted the waiter delivering 3 baby-cinos (teeny weeny 'coffee' cups filled with milk froth for little kids) to a nearby table.

Where Will I be in 10-15 Years Time?

enjoying a succesful career,
having fun at parties and concerts,
self sufficient and independent,
you're okay with or
without a man,
you're content
just happily living with someone -
your beloved dog!


What will you be like 10 to 15 years from now? (girls)
brought to you by Quizilla

Err.. huh? No thanks to Jikon and Meesh.

Kuza goes to Warwick

Congratulations to Kuza, who will be flying of to the UK in a week's time to pursue her Masters in IT for the Manufacturing sector. Interesting how things just fall into place - she's been working in IT for several large manufacturing companies for the last 5 years, and upon hitting a plateau in what she could gain from on-the-job learning, she found a different path to progress.

Kuza has always been one who continues to surprise the living daylights out of people. In school, she quietly chugs along, yet always relentless when it comes to asking questions. She doesn't scream out - "Hey, look at me!", like some people do, but in her own way, she makes you want to look, and continue looking. I guess her sponsor looked hard enough and saw the talent and spirit.

I noticed this quote on a poster at the office today - "The most enriching sound makes the least noise." That's Kuza alright.

Have a good trip, my friend. You've always been an inspiration to me - I know you'll make full use of this opportunity, as you always do, and make sure you enjoy yourself along the way.

Melbourne: Sweet Things

The thing about going around Melbourne is that good coffee is as prevalent there as teh tarik is here. And it's cheap - enough. A good cup of coffee can be anything between AUD1.50 and AUD3.00 (that cup at Laurent was steep, but worth every single cent!). And what's so good about having coffee? The desserts that come with it.

While we were in Melbourne, Victoria, my friend Victoria had a list of streets to go to (as opposed to me, who had a list of things to eat). These were:

Chapel St
Swanston St
Smith St
Brunswick St
Ackland St

Ackland St is in close proximity to Luna Park and St Kilda Beach, and is renown for its pastries. We took a while to choose which shop to go to, and while Victoria was on the phone, I made the executive decision to go to the one with all of the following:

Florentines
Cannoli
Baklava (although, sad to say, I actually forgot to have any during my trip)
Eclairs
Vanilla Slices

Of course, these shops have at least 30 different other pastries, sweets and cakes, but this list constituted the craving for the day.

Suffice to say, we were stuffed after 4 plates of dessert, and had to walk it off. Lucky the beach was nearby.

Unfortunately, it didn't stop the cravings on another day though.

Tim Tams: The Real Deal

What's the fuss about Tim Tams?

Yes, you can get them locally, but due to the warm temperatures here, they've had to change the milk content of the chocolate to ensure that these wonderful morsels of fat do not melt enroute to local points of sale, or at the shops itself.

Tim Tams got to Malaysia sometime last year or early this year, and I was among the first to welcome it to our shores. However, I was unaware then of this minor adjustment to Tim Tam adaptability in tropical climates, and bit into a mouthful of disappointment.

Local Tim Tams are nice on their own, but if you lived through 5 years of the real deal, and did the 'slam' (widely publicised by a song that was popularised over Triple J) - with coffee, preferably lattes, you will be able to appreciate the stark difference between the two variations.

Original Tim Tams (i.e. the ones produced for consumption in Australia and New Zealand) cannot be stored at Malaysian room temperature. They literally melt off your fingers. These biscuits come in variations as follows: Chewy Caramel, Hazelnut Praline (my personal favourite), Double Coat (ultra-rich!), Dark Chocolate, Mocha, Chewy Choc Fudge and of course, the original flavour. (I have most of this in my fridge... *evil grin*)

Other Arnott's biscuits that give a similar high to Tim Tams - Gaiety - same chocolate, but instead of a biscuit sandwich, you get thin wafers - much like what you get in Kit Kats.

Local Tim Tams come in original or white - although I'm not sure whether they have diversified it seeing that I've grown accustomed to the original ones.

And no, this is not reflective of any deep-set colonial mentality i.e. local products no good. Just that the 'same' food in different countries will undoubtably taste different because of local conditions or supply of ingredients.

Tim Tams and its effects on human behaviour

Once I couldn't get them anymore, I started behaving like a crack addict. I horded whatever little supply I had, until I realised that I was surrounded by colleagues that constantly travelled to Australia or New Zealand.

Hence I began recruiting suppliers, from Gordon to JP and now, to Padma, who regularly returns to Melbourne to visit family.

Once I was assured of a consistent supply, I became more free to share them with the less fortunate, who first scoffed at the power of this humble-looking biscuit (there are no fancy logos, no cutsie packages...), but immediately succumb to its delights on first bite. This, I discovered, was a more potent and reliable way of making people smile - so in the spirit of true Tim Tam addicts, I began to realise that the thing with Tim Tams is that it is best when shared with others.

Of course, as with true junkies, I do have my personal stash safely locked away in the office drawers. :P

Melbourne: Jung-Gay Mao - Scaredy Cat Extraordinaire

It's funny how much people change in the span of a couple of years. Monica used to come over my cat-ridden apartment and tip toe around the army of cats that co-habitated with us. She was never the cat or pet person, choosing to seek solace in bottles (alcohol or nail polish... whichever was convenient at the time!).

Hence, you can imagine my surprise when she told me about the new man in her life, a beautiful feline called Jung-Gay Mao, the most timid cat I have ever met. I chased him around Depika's (Mon's sister) beautiful new house, but once he was in my arms, he stayed quiet and, I hoped, contented.

Nice cat. Very feline.

Back and Overwhelmed.

Hey you. I'm back. After almost two weeks of hopping from KL to Singapore to Melbourne to Singapore and back to KL, I am refreshed and rejuvenated, and somewhat re-born.

The trip was a wonderful blend of business and pleasure, and I am ever grateful to have spent the time with good friends - Victoria, Raimy, Monica and Depika, David, Dharshini and family, Fische, Wai Bien, Mei Yin, Beng Ti and Claire. I am happy to have also got the chance to make new friends - Ramia, Francis, and especially John, Mel and baby Claire.

I managed to track trends in international retail economics e.g. differences in prices of Nine West shoes and trinkets from George Jensen, and the vast variances of cafe lattes (or crappy lattes as they are more aptly known as in Singapore) from country to country.

The trip was indeed a gastronomic delight, Singapore a near exception until we hit that Nasi Padang place. Melbourne's restaurants and residents were wonderful hosts to a fussy pescetarian diner, and they never failed to deliver.

Some highlights (or at least the ones I could remember) were Ackland St and its pastries, Georgios (a wonderfully light spaghetti marinara), the whole of Lygon St, Cafe Nova on Brunswick St and its quaint fireplace, Cafe e Cuccina on Chapel St, LiveBait at the Docklands, the Curry Club in Richmond (a nice reminder of what Indian food should be), Laurent (I will never look at French pastry in the same way again), and not to forget, my most favourite place, Callis and Forrest - for a most wonderful farewell breakfast (their signature roti and scrambled eggs with chilli jam is not as it used to be, but close enough to remind me of days gone by).

I was fortunate enough to have friends who took me to high places - Mount Dandenong Observatory near Melbourne, The China Club at Capitol Tower and The Ritz Carlton in Singapore.

I had some wonderful solitary moments at St Kilda Beach at sunset, contemplating life and what the future holds for me. I even managed to get some tips from The Rage of Placid Lake, a newly released Australian movie.

I took a lot of shots, most of which of food - Mon called me 'the frustrated food photographer'. I may even consider that as a potential career change option, if I get to keep the camera that was lent to me.

I'm tired yet rested, with a sense of clarity that only the clear endless skies of Australia could give one so used to the busy KL skyline. This post will serve as a temporary placeholder, as I unpack my AUD100 worth of Tim Tams (yes, you people at the office get some too...) and nougat, and slowly ease myself into my mundane KL existence.

*sigh*

Roaming About Melbourne

As I was strolling about Melbourne's central business district this rainy Sunday afternoon, I started noticing how quiet the city is now as compared to the last time I was here, 3 years ago.

A lot of things have changed, and business is noticeably slow. The Myer cafeteria, which opened during the time I was studying here, is now a poor version of the vibrant marketplace cum foodcourt it once was. Even the David Jones restaurant has a prominent sign - that it is now permanently closed.

More of Melbourne here.